If I ruled...

If I ruled the universe, Karma would be measured in zits. If you are a good person, no zits. If you're an asshole, lots of zits. It only seems fair.

That way, 1.) You'd know the good eggs from the bad, and 2.) There would actually be some punishment for idiots who get away with murder, or those who don't wave when you let them into traffic. I HATE when people don't wave when I let them into traffic.

If karma was measured in zits, you'd think I robbed a bank, kicked a puppy, burned down a nursing home then went to snack time at the local KinderKare and ate all the rice crispy treats so the little kids went hungry. Yeah, it's that bad.

If you don't see me tomorrow, check my bed- I either OD'd on Clearasil or just refuse to come out from under the covers.