Fear

Everyone has fears. It's natural. It's also natural for friends and family of the fearful to make fun of them. For instance: one of the first times we went to the pit this summer, it was me, Bro and friends we gre up with who are also brothers, JP and Junior. (I'll call him Junior because he's the youngest by far in our group of friends. So young that I used to babysit him. Sidenote- you are officially OLD when kids you babysat are now in college) The boys were all fishing, I was just floating- catchin some rays. Bro had this innertube that's like a lazyboy recliner meets innertube meets bass boat. It's for fisherman to sit in, float, and still be able to fish. It even comes with flippers! Well Junior was a little jealous, so he folded up a raft and sat on it so he could sit up and fish too. JP fished from the shore until it got too hot, then he came in the water and we shared a raft, kicking out to where Bro and Junior were fishing in the center of the pond. On our way out, something BIG jumped out of the water between us and our brothers. Immediately Bro and Juniors legs came flying out of the water like they were in shark infested waters. Bro said "I knew watching Deep Blue Sea before coming out here would be a mistake!" JP and I, of course, laughed our heads off and ridiculed our pansy ass younger brothers for being such wienies.

Logically, we know there's a better chance we'll invent the cure for baldness, a diet pill that actually works and a money tree than we have of getting attacked by a shark in the pit. It's fresh water for starters. Hundreds of miles from any ocean. So clear you could see the shark coming for you if there was indeed a shark. But the human mind is a funny thing... your heart still pounds, your mind races and you want your feet out of the water and where you can see them!

It's bad enough when a rouge blue gill nips at my fingers or toes- somehow I seem to be the only person out of the bunches of us that have swam at the pit that has gotten bit. Lucky Me. Rouge blue gills aside,
I've never had more than slight, passing anxiety at the pit. Until recently. I decided (once I paid my hefty library fines...) that I need to start reading more classic novels. I started with Lonesome Dove by Larry McGurty. I've never seen the movie, or tv show or whatever it was- just heard it was a great book about an important time in US history. It was a good book, a long book, but a good one. Well it's also kind of graphic. In one part, a woman was kidnapped- her abductor told her he would cut a hole in her stomach, tie her guts to a stick, drag her body 40 feet away and leave her to watch the coyotes eat her guts until she dies if she tried to run away. Yeah. I don't really know why I told you that, other than it was pretty inventive. And she didn't run away! Well the scene that really got me, just gives me the willies, is a bunch of cowboys were herding cattle to Montana from Texas and they had come to the first river they needed to cross. During the chaos of the river crossing, a young boy somehow rode his horse into a nest of copperhead snakes in the middle of the river and was bitten a dozen times. He died.

Now I don't like snakes to begin with, in fact I flat out hate them. Can't even hardly watch a tv show if there are snakes on it. I'm having a hard time even typing the S word! So now, whenever I'm in the water, I'm not worried about sharks, I'm worried about swimming through a nest of copperhead snakes! Stupid Larry McGurty and his stupid classic American novel!

"You want a beer? How bout a shot too?"

Of course I said yes. I wasn't about to turn down a free beer LET ALONE a shot! Now let me back up and tell you why I was offered a beer and a shot.

Last night Bro and Girl asked if I wanted to go to dinner with them, then watch their first sand volleyball game in Kent. Both Bro and Girl are really good about inviting me out with them, its just that sometimes I don't like being the third wheel. So I said, "I'll go, thanks for not minding me being the third wheel!" Then Bro said, "Well you have to admit, you are really good at it!" I love my brother, I love my brother, I love my brother...

We went to Penn Station for subs and fries. I had never been before, it was really good, don't get me wrong... but I like Jimmy John's better. After Penn Station, we headed for the bowling alley. They have 2 sand volleyball courts out front, along with a tiki bar and a few tables and chairs for spectators. We had no sooner gotten there, got a round of beers and sat down when it started to rain. Then lightning. Then POUR. So we slogged through the rain to the inside bar. The only thought in my head was 'please Erin, do not slip and fall on the pavement and bite it in front of all these people!'

Well we safely made it inside, but it was a weird crowd at the bar. An old crowd. A really ridiculously dressed up crowd for a bowling alley bar crowd. Only 2 things that made sense to us- that's where all the townies come since the students have overrun every other bar in the city, OR it was a 20 year high school reunion. But they didn't have name tags- so I'm going with the townies. Since it was so crowded, we only grabbed a beer and went to sit in the almost dead bowling alley. Bro was fascinated watching some nerd get strike after strike. Yeah, it was impressive, but the guy probably eats, breathes and sleeps bowling and uses his bowling score as a pick up line. If he ever talks to girls. And no, the teenager at the shoe return counter does not count.

Not long after we were sitting inside, more of their teammates arrived. The rain slowed, so we headed outside. The lightning had stopped and the rain had slowed down enough so they got the game going. It was Girl and a bunch of her co-workers and their significant others on the team. I bought another beer and stood at a table under an umbrella to watch the game. It was still raining, at times it was really coming down. Then I had to pee. So I slipped off my shoes, waited for a lull in the rain and jogged to the entrance awning of the bowling alley, where I saw an old friend talking with his buddy. I stopped to say hello then headed into the bathroom.

Coming out of the bowling alley, carrying my beer in a can in one hand, purse and shoes in the other I started jogging back out through the rain to my table and umbrella. Somewhere between the awning, my table and the tiki bar full of people I slipped and fell. Totally bit it. In front of like 40 people. Granted 15 of those people were playing volleyball- but still. So sitting on my butt on the wet pavement, getting rained on, with 20 or so wide eyed, open mouthed people staring at me, I said the first thing that popped into my head. "And she's SAFE!" When all else fails, throw out a baseball reference.

The bartender held out a new can of beer for me, "You want a beer?" I walked to the tiki hut, took my beer and said "Hey folks, the show was free tonight!" they laughed. Then the bartender said "How bout a shot too?" Um, I just fell on my ass in front of a ton of people- of course I want a shot too!

I have a friend, Harry, who used to call the scrapes and bruises you inevitably wake up with after a night of drinking MARIs. Miscellaneous Alcohol Related Injuries. Normally, my alcohol related injuries are miscellaneous and I have a hard time remembering exactly how they occurred. Unfortunately, this morning, I clearly remembered every detail. Oh well, good thing I don't have a problem being the headline of someone elses story. Can't you hear it now, "Oh my gosh, I was at the bar last night and some girl totally bit it!" Yeah, that's me. Some girl.

Did ya miss me?

Sorry it's been so long! In my defense, the computer is downstairs- my air conditioner is upstairs... need I say more? Plus I've been busy going on lame dates and motorcycle rides (not at the same time- Lame and Motorcycle do not belong in the same sentence).

So yeah, Match.com is really working... kinda. I was talking to Bubble Gum tonight about the dates I've been on in the past month (1 good, 2 mediocre and 1 just lame) and I told her I hadn't seen anyone a second time- she asked "Is it because you can't find someone one or are you just being picky again?" I said "Picky. Hello, you met my ex. Not goin down that road again!"

Date run-down: #1 was half asleep, balked at buying my $2.50 beer, when he came back from the atm with money to buy my beer he threw the money at me not the bartender. I should have left right then. It didn't really get better. Also, the bar had a stripper pole in the middle of the dance floor. Yeah. #2 was actually good- we went for a ride on his motorcycle, kicked another couples butt at pool and made hotdogs over a campfire for dinner. I would have seen him again EXCEPT he was still in love with his ex-girlfriend. Can't compete with that. #3 was a really nice guy- just not my type at all. For instance, I like the sun, I don't live in my parents basement, I'm not into video games and I'm not on anti-depressants. Turns out we didn't have all that much in common. But he was very nice (must be good drugs). #4 I had hopes for. Had being the key word. A run down of our date: Meet at bar, order drinks, Leo walks in (#4 used to work with Leo), I pretty much cease to exist and the world stops spinning so #4 can talk to Leo, Leo's wife tries to talk with me- but she's shit faced so it was just a lot of slurring, I pick up the tv remote and find Nitro Circus on the bar tv while I drink my beer in silence, order second beer, Leo & Robin leave, we leave, #4 does not get a call back. Needless to say, the search continues.

So I'm pretty sure the biggest thing to happen since I've last written, besides my lack luster love life and getting piss ass drunk on the 4th of July (which I won't go into detail about here... but lets just say All Drunks Should Wear Life Jackets!) has been the Cops 4 Kids With Autism poker run.

About 2 months ago Julianna came to the shop to see if we'd donate some signs and a vehicle wrap for her organization, Cops 4 Kids With Autism. As she was telling me about C4KWA, we were both standing there trying not to cry... she was sucking up tears because she was so passionate about it, I was sucking them up because I'm the sentimental type . Julianna and her husband are both cops and they have an autistic son. They started this program about 5 years ago to help other families with autistic children. The long and the short of it is, people donate things for the entire family- even the pets, the things are put into huge baskets for families with an autistic child, a uniformed police officer from the childs community hand delivers the basket to the family. Not only does it help form a good repoire between the family and the police officer, but the police department will know that an autistic child lives in the home in case there is an emergency. For instance, if the child should run away, the police department has on file a list of places near the families home that are dangerous such as railroad tracks or a pond.

As of now, 5 counties are involved with Cops 4 Kids with Autism, and they add a county every year- Portage is scheduled to be added in 2010. This year was the first annual Cops 4 Kids With Autism Poker Run. The company I work for donated a few banners and wrapped Julianna's ugly old maroon van. See pictures above! Since I had worked so hard and so closely on this project, I really wanted to be involved in the poker run. (A poker run is a motorcycle ride for charity- there are 5 stops, and at each stop riders draw a card. The best poker hand at the end wins a prize.) I had intended on date #2 sticking around long enough so I could ride with him in the poker run, but since that didn't happen, Julianna got me set up with her friend Tony. Tony's a Cleveland police officer and graciously put up with my back seat driving and yammering all day. I think as good karma for putting up with me, he won the 50-50 raffle at the end of the day. But great guy that he is, Tony donated his winnings back to C4KWA.

The day of the ride was funny/weird for me. I had to get up at like 6 on a SATURDAY when I normally don't even get up until 8:15-8:30 to be at work at 9 Mon-Fri. I met one of our customers Stace in Ravenna and road to Medina with him. Stace has a towing company, Schumann's Roadside out of Rootstown. He stopped in for graphics on one of his trucks and we told him about the poker run. He got into it! He told us he would donate his truck and motorcycle transport trailer for the day, in case anyone broke down. If Stace wasn't already one of our favorite customers, him donating his time and his trailer for the day would have sealed the deal. So anyway, I was going to meet Stace and his new fiance Molly in Ravenna and ride with them, that way I wouldn't have to worry about how I'd get back to my car. Remember I said that. Turns out Molly had to work so it was just Stace and I. Since he was driving, I brought coffee and doughnut holes for breakfast :)

We get down to Century Harley Davidson in Medina around 8. Remember, I'm usually still sleeping at 8. And we help get things set up for registration to start at 9. I had all intentions of being a good little worker bee, but there were a lot of workers and I got bored, so I ended up wandering off. Happens to the best of us. Eventually I found myself hanging out with Julianna's son, The Original Cops 4 Kids Kid. He's great! He wanted me to give him a piggy back ride, I couldn't turn him down. When he hopped on he leaned over my shoulder and told me, "You're my favorite piggy!" Almost a week later and that still makes me smile! Finally around 11, we had the blessing of the bikes then everyone started their engines and we were off!

It was so cool, for a first time Poker Runner, to see over 200 bikes, a handful of decorated cars, a big van, a tow truck and motorcycle trailer and a bunch of cop cars parading down the road. I didn't realize but poker runs are kinda like funerals- you don't stop for red lights, you keep the group together and you keep moving. Tony was saying there's a poker run in Cleveland every year that has over 1500 bikes. That would be a something to see! It was so cool though, people would wave and honk their horns, really get into it. I felt like I was in a really awesome, really fast paced parade. There was even this one old hill billy standing in his side yard with his long grey hair, big bushy grey beard, wearing a wife beater and either boxer briefs or just really short shorts, waving both arms at us as we rode by.

We started in Medina and ended in Wakeman, which is really freakin far away from my neck of the woods. From there, I was going to ride back to Ravenna to get my car with Stace. Except somewhere during the day, Molly's truck broke down with a flat in Warren and Stace didn't have any tow trucks to send out to get her. Kind of the shoe makers kids go barefoot thing, I guess... Tow truck guys fiance gets stranded. So we were going to leave early the ride. No big deal, the ride was over, we were just hanging out and eating at the end of the ride cook out. Plus, I was tired and had a nice set of raccoon eyes from the sun and wind on my face except where my sunglasses were. Well, Tony offered to drive me back so Stace wouldn't have to double back to Ravenna then to his shop for a spare tire then out to pick up Molly. So my grand master plan of getting a ride with Stace so I wouldn't have to inconvenience anyone with taking me back to my car went right out the window. Tony and I waited until the big raffles were done, then he took me back to Ravenna. From there he went on to Wadsworth to a party. He put some miles on his bike that day, I'll tell you what. I was one tired puppy when I got back, but the last thing I wanted to do was sit down after I'd been sitting on the bike all day!

Cops 4 Kids With Autism raised over $3000 from the poker run. It's a great feeling knowing I was involved. For more information, or if you'd like to donate or be involved with next years poker run check out their website at http://www.cops4kidswithautism.com/